My Shrink Has an iPad

Psych assessment. Was more nervous that I thought I would be, the meeting with the Social Worker got into a lot of detail, so mentally I was gearing up for the same thing. But it wasn't, not in the slightest.
This meeting was all about finding out if I had any mental reason that may either prevent me from donating, or, that may have an impact of the post-op.

Here's how it went: Appoint was for 2pm, I was there at 1:30. Needlessly early for sure, but wasn't sure if there was going to be paperwork or anything like that to fill out. There wasn't. Thankfully I came prepared with a book (The Great Gatsby) and waited. 2:05 and the Dr comes out to get me.

He was younger than I anticipated, very well dressed and well spoken. His office was a decent size, not cramped but not overly large. Noticeably absent was a chaise lounge or a couch, or any of the typical furnishing you may expect in a shrink's office. Had I not know what he did, I would not have expected this to be a psychiatrist's office. The only thing that would have tipped me off was a rather spectacular work of abstract art.
Moving on.

He didn't have a lot of information on me or my specific case, so as we are doing the intro chatting and he asks who the recipient is. My answer "I don't know". Conversation on the uniqueness of the situation ensues. Needless to say we skipped the part relating to if I'm being coerced into donating.

First the talk about do think I will have any regrets. If I got really sick in a few years and it was because I only had one kidney, would I regret my decision? No. I wouldn't. And the reason is that would be assuming that my life is worth more than the recipients. From this he asked if I thought my life wasn't worth much, so I clarified. People seem to be able to be rude to complete strangers, but would never treat a friend in the same way; its as though many people view a stranger's life to be worth less because they don't know them. I don't feel that way. Just because I do not know who this person is or what their story is does not mean that they are worth any more or any less than me. I know who I am and what I'm about.

If the doctor were to call my husband and ask him if he wanted the donation stopped, I could honestly say that he would support me 100%. Then he asked me if I wanted him to write a note saying that I am unable to donate due to medical reasons. No. This has come to mean more to me then I thought it would and I would be crushed if I couldn't donate for some reason.

The questions went on like this: "Do you smoke?" "no." "Do you drink?" "On occasion." "Tell me about a time, when you were at your heaviest drinking, how much did you drink?" "I had a 17day bender." "And you were drinking every day?" "Yes." "When was this?" "2007. Started in Amsterdam, had a 5 day road trip to Prague, Vienna and Budapest, back to Amsterdam and finishing with 5 days in London."
Then the questions turned to sleeping and if I ever felt like I didn't need sleep, when I had gone the longest without sleeping (5 years on University, need I say more?) and if i ever felt like I didn't need to sleep. No. I always need sleep.

It was pretty easy to see what his questions were getting at. Do I ever think that someone/something is out to get me. Do I ever feel like I need to repeat an action multiple times because doing it once is not good enough. Do I feel like I can talk to God/the Devil/ a spiritual being. Have I ever been really sad and not able to be happy for a period of time. Have I ever had panic attacks.

The only reason I may do something more than once is because I'm absent minded and can easily forget what time it is although I just checked my watch (and by watch I mean my phone) 30seconds ago. I do believe that everything happens for a reason, we just don't know it yet, but that doesn't mean that I feel as though I am not in control of my own destiny.

It was not as scary as I thought it was going to be. We talked about the meds that I will be on post-op to help with the pain and swelling, and how they may make me prone to panic attacks or depressive symptoms, and how becoming addicted is a real possibility. That was actually good to know, that I should avoid stress and need to be aware of my dose and how my body is reacting.

But, he did say that from his perspective, there was nothing stopping me from donating. Yay! I'm sane!

But far an above how fun it was chatting with my Dr, was the post-evaluation chat where I spied his iPad and he let me touch it. We discussed about how (since I am into classic literature and all the books in the iBook store are classics and free) I should clearly have one to keep me occupied during recovery. I fully agree. He's a Mac nerd, as am I. Always good meeting kindred spirits.

What's left? Review of all the test results, picking which kidney they are going to take, finding a match and finally the surgery. Yay!