I know that I should love my scars, they represent a wonderful thing that I did and are relatively small. But, I don't. I am very aware of them and the way they look, and have purchased a scar-diminishing gel to help reduce their appearance. I'm not the type of girl that goes around showing off her stomach or anything like that, but I did realize the other day that there will always be the 'scar factor' to consider when doing anything such as going swimming, having exposed skin for whatever reason... and I'm not overly comfortable with that. I mean, I don't like feeling like when I go swimming I should wear a 1piece to cover the scars regardless of if that is what I would choose regularly or not. And I know that I shouldn't be ashamed of my scars, but I do have to admit I am body conscious to begin with and this just adds another layer to that.
Right now as the scars are very new, I feel like if they were to be seen, they would invite a lot of questions, and again, I am a very private person when it comes to talking about my surgery, so I'm not very interested in deflecting questions or looks. So, what I'm doing is trying this diminishing gel in hopes that the scars will fade and eventually you will hardly be able to see them at all. Thankfully, the surgeon was very, very good and they are minimal and healing very well, but I want them gone. I mean, I am a young woman, and scars are permanent.
Here's hoping the gel works, and especially since the scars are so new, that they fade fast and soon no one would be able to tell.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
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I just stumbled across your blog and spent the last hour reading the whole thing. I think what you did was incredible. I understand your not wanting your scars to be so visible but they will forever be a reminder of the beautiful gift you gave someone.
ReplyDeleteYou are truly a special person.
Thank you JRose for your comment. I feel very blessed to have been able to make the donation - to have had the support from my friends and family, to be healthy enough to donate (and not finding anything lurking in the background during all the tests). I would go back and do it all over again if I had the opportunity.
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